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Post by X factor on Mar 15, 2022 18:19:28 GMT -5
 Now that I've stopped drinking, I'm losing weight, even becoming skinny, which for some odd reason I want. I'm changing in a lot of ways actually, emotionally subtle ways. No telling what's going on with bodies chemistry.
Note how in video, the closet monster said or says 'As we get stronger you shall get weaker'
And I think that's coming true, as the closet monsters get stronger, and gain control over you, you're getting weaker, just like what was or is said, or written in the above video.
It's probably why you have no energy as of late, and keep losing weight, you may of opened a pandora box of spirits that now see you as their B____h.
Or I could be wrong. |
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Post by X factor on Jul 17, 2023 20:48:58 GMT -5
Why?  I know gifs are popular now, as a way to layer ones art or portrait, but sometimes a good old fashioned still abstract portrait can still work. The title of this 'Why?' Everyone gets to a certain point in their life where they simply ask 'Why?', for whatever reasons.
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Post by X factor on Aug 6, 2023 14:34:52 GMT -5
I have to present self in ways that make me happy, not in ways that comfort strangers I don't know  I have to present self in ways that make me happy, not in ways that comfort strangers I don't know. And as a male, there are times when I need to see myself looking young, vibrant and happy, to better reflect the spirit inside of me that the world, this world, will try to squash if you let it. There is nothing sinful about wanting to look beautiful to self, not to others, but to self. This idea that only females are allowed to project beauty, says who?? Says insecure men and women, I suppose. Deal with it, not all males are ugly, nor do all males want to look or be ugly.
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Post by X factor on Oct 1, 2023 0:44:20 GMT -5
Art relaxes  I need to start getting back into creating cool abstract art. Art relaxes, art helps pull you away from the madness going on all around us.
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Post by X factor on Oct 1, 2023 1:04:11 GMT -5
One of my favorite self portraits ever, that just never got any traction, oh well, I like it  One of my favorite self portraits ever, but it never got any traction...it's one reason why I just gave up on social media... You have to be like apart of certain societies, clubs, social groups, ect, in order for people to promote your art work, if not, doesn't matter how good or dazzling or retrospective your stuff is, it won't get traction. Or at least not until your long gone and dead. I hate how others only tend to notice how 'brilliant' you are only after you're dead and gone...that sucks. But while alive, they, society, ignored you, cause your talent and skill was still a threat to them, I guess.
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Post by X factor on Oct 1, 2023 1:08:20 GMT -5
I've gone through so many phases through my self portraits, from wanting to look tough and mean, to soft, to younger and or even older, to dainty, to silly, it all just depends on where I'm at on the inside, I suppose. Life circumstances dictate how portraits come out, I suppose...  |
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Post by X factor on Oct 4, 2023 22:24:32 GMT -5
Drilled I just created this portrait of self moments ago, titled 'Drilled', I mean what else, since holding drill in hands. It's actually an older portrait that I kind of spoofed up. I enlarged the feet and head area, which probably makes me look younger in portrait than I really am. It's been a while since I've taking new fresh camera portraits, like I used to do....I think video has made me lazy and gifs. With video, you just move around and then simply freeze frame and crop whatever moment you like, where as with the camera, you sit and pose...and maybe out of 10 pics, you're lucky if 1-3 pass the muster. Anyways, just bored, killing time (actually time is killing me), but while here I continue to cave write on the walls.
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Post by X factor on Oct 23, 2023 19:05:11 GMT -5
Like, I'm totally confused right now  
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Post by X factor on Oct 30, 2023 14:14:29 GMT -5
I used to want to use my skills to make other people look beautiful, but then others would imply 'Hey, you can't exploit other peoples beauty'..Huh?
So, well, then I decided to make my own self look beautiful instead, and the same people still get upset and mad...talk about odd Certain types get upset if you make others look beautiful, but then the same types get upset if you make yourself look beautiful through art....well screw them, those types, and let them stay in their hole of grouchiness forever. Me, while alive, and able to create, well, I'm going to live, through whatever medium I'm able to. And I'm going to create portrait art that represents the true me, not the me the world demands I be, which is something I don't recognize. Some people are naturally beautiful and radiant (physically), well, I'm not, but what I lack in looks I more than make up for in personality. Art simply allows my other side to live and be seen.
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Post by X factor on Nov 1, 2023 18:24:16 GMT -5
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Post by X factor on Jan 24, 2024 7:48:38 GMT -5
Gravity You never quite know where a person is, mentally, until you study their art, or at least where they are in that moment.
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