Bi-curious, confused, doll section

I'm not gay or anything, but I had a dream last night of pursing and being pursued back, by a nice looking, tall, (maybe 5' 7-8"), white blondish male with short frizzy type hair cut.

I'd say they were around 23 or so.

They caught my eyes in a bar, we caught each others eyes, and then next thing I know they're teasing me at a peer by the water front, like playing 'catch me if you can' type of game.

And boy did I want to catch them, but couldn't at first, cause they were fit and kept running, ducking, and slipping under peers, wooden ones, down by the water. (not sure what city it was, a made up dream city I guess)

While on the peer I crossed two cats, one was red, the other green or blue, totally un natural colors. They were chained to a peer post right next to a dock, there was like multiple layers of docks, this was the bottom one where a lot of morning shade was.

Anyways, at this time cute sandy blonde haired guy came over, as we were both baffled over who would chain to cats to peer like that and leave them, so we began talking, I liked them, they liked me, and the next thing I know they were sitting on my lap...

We were talking, and this cute white guy just decided to sit on my lap and they were wearing 'spandex'...green or blue..(this was a dream so hard to remember details).

But I do remember how wonderful it felt, how wonderful they felt, and how soft their legs felt while sitting on my lap.

They were thin, but not 'hard', so even though legs were thin, still had gushy soft feel to them, and I loved it.

But what made me love it so much is it was a mutual thing, no coaxing, no convincing, they simply sat on my lap and figured I wouldn't mind at all, and I didn't.

I guess they figured if I was pursing them around the peer, why would I mind if they sat on my lap.

I suppose I could of been offended, but not sure why, and wasn't.

There's just something about younger white males that I find totally adorable and more clean and wholesome than most females, which I see as manipulative, lying, conniving devils or witches, who control everything and always make you feel unworthy.

If angels exist, I think younger white males are a better reflection of what an angel would look like.

I'm not gay or anything, but find younger white male dolls totally adorable for many reasons, and probably most of those reasons have to do with false perception, cause I do know reality never or seldom lives up to ones own perceptions.

Some bias is good, other bias is negative, I tend to have a positive slant or bias towards younger white males.

For one their hands are soft, their feet are soft, younger white males have softer hands and feet than black female dolls.



That totally throws me off every time. I'm like how is it that younger white male dolls have feet that are more soft and feminine, and more pleasant to look at than urban black females who have these coarse, hard, scarred, chappy feet with dagger like toe nails (who ever told them that was attractive?)

And I was raised in all white doll area, so from time I was young, that has always been my standard of attraction.

I was raised around people who had soft white feet, and soft hands, not course rough feet, with jagged toe nails like what some tribal witch would have.

Younger white male dolls are just everything I'd want a female to be, including personality, style, habits and mannerism.

No attitude, mannerable, nice, polite, humble, willing to learn, willing to admit mistakes, not to proud to help you out if you need, not afraid to get dirty, practical, simplistic and more.

Basically the perfect woman in a male dolls body.

I shook a younger white males dolls hand once, and it felt like silk, smooth and soft, I almost melted.

Sorry, but I'm attracted to that which is softer than myself.

So how can I be attracted to a female, if the female is more rough than me?

I think my body, subconscious body, is simply attracted to that which is beautiful, regardless of gender, since reproduction isn't even apart of the equation.

If younger white male dolls could have babies, that would be ideal, but as of now, they cannot.

Anyways, I'm not gay, but just wanted to share that.

Why must I always be told whom I must be attracted to?

Why must I be attracted to the same person all the time?

Don't other dolls realize there's many different levels to attraction, and not all of it has to do with marriage and reproduction.

A lot of it has to do with your past, who you were around then, and who you want to be close to now.

No doll is ever always in one place all the time in their mind, if so we'd be basic programmed animals, instead of intelligent reflections of man.

When I wake up, I know who I want to hug me, and whom I want to hug.
I know what I want, what I need to heal, but seems with each passing day the distance between what I want, and what reality has dealt me, grows further apart.

I like what I like, what am I suppose to do?

Church?

Women just don't turn me on anymore in hardly any way.

Only tom boyish hardy, yet cute women do, but where I live they're so hard to meet, and even if I did they wouldn't like me back.

Family wouldn't allow ect.

Where as cute male I can be friends with, and not nearly as much social layers of BS have to navigate through.

I'm not sure what I am.

I"m 'non soxual', or 'not soxually active' is a better way to put it, but I forget that so many others are.

I'm fun loving and friendly, even jolly at times, but here's the thing, often times others interpit that the wrong way.

I think a younger male doll is starting to like me, but what they don't understand is that I'm not soxually active with anyone or anything, I'm just a fun loving doll.

But gay male dolls think narrowly, like women, I guess, in that being friendly and kind means you like them, and want a physical relationship.

I've learned relationships of any kind are dangerous, cause there's always shady characters in the background that get 'jealous', and do stupid things, this applies to Hetero dolls and or LGBTQ Dolls alike.

With single life, there's just no drama, none, no fights to get into, no break ups, don't have to deal with 'moods', trying to figure out 'other person', and all of that.

And then if attached emotionally, then break up, that's when you see the ugliest side of whomever you broke up with, people can get nasty and vengeful, and share to the world all you shared with them, especially in this age of social media.

One minute you're handsome or cute or pretty, the next minute after a fight, your partner is calling you ugly...

Relationships just bring so much drama, stress, anxiety and more.

All for a few moments or minutes of romance?

Is it worth it?

It's like going through a Hurricane, just to get one small piece of candy in the end, is it worth it?

It just bugs me how some gay dolls don't wanna get to know anything about you, your interests, likes, dislikes, your moods, your politics, or even religion or spirituality, it's like none of that matters, rather if you look 'good' to them...'Hey, can I give you a hair dryer?'.

That just turns me off for some reason.