I feel scared right now, not really of anyone, but rather of the unsuredness of my future.
The uncertainty of it all.
Employment, job, bills, goals and dreams, they're all interconnected.
Stable employment means you can concentrate on other stuff when off work, but if job situation changes, it just creates turmoil in other areas of your life.
And employers are so slavish, in their need to control your schedule, as if you don't have a life of your own.
Jobs want you to work self to death, and still be broke, or come home to tired and worn to do anything else.
Jobs that want you to report at like 5 am, or that you must wake up at 4 am to be there on time.
I just can't do that no more, and that's what scares me, cause what I want now, what I need now, is flexibility, very few labor type jobs give that to you.
The older you get, the more you want to live for self, if that makes sense, and the foolishness in it all you begin to see, this idea of showing up to a job daily, and still not making it.
I've become a bit more alive lately, do to current schedule, and the idea of going back to a job, schedule, where they rob me of 'self', really scares me, cause I can't go through that again, living just to work, that is. To me that's death, death to self.
We're all different and have different needs I suppose, if have family responsibilities than I guess working self to death makes sense, but if don't have the above, than what's the point?
4 day work weeks are all I need, and if can't get, than may have to go 'contract' route, with all these use your own car delivery services, at least then can work when want.
Passive income is where it's at, money you can earn while doing nothing do to product you provide be it on line or other.
Roommates can also cut down on expenses and kill the need to have to work long and hard every day.
My goal is to have enough passive income coming in to where I don't ever have to leave place unless I want.
I'm scared because I no longer have the drive or ambition to work mindless jobs anymore and I know that could hurt me fiscally.
But showing up to place I hate, doing mindless work, depresses me.
It's so meaningless, and if the people you work around are bland, it's even worse.
Bosses who feel you owe them your soul, add that to the mix also.
Failing is scary, until you actually do fail, then after you do actually fail, you realize they can actually do no more to you, then comes the feeling of liberation and enlightment (or however spelled)
Ye, I'll admit I do feel scared right now, about what? About tomorrow, about the future, which does seem to be a very common theme in this section here.
I just feel scared about tomorrow and my ability to deal with stuff, dissolving job, having to find another place to work that may not give me same relaxing schedule where allowed to relax and recover on the side.
It all just worries me.
I hate, totally despise the idea of only being alive to pay bills and scrape buy, while working full time....what a sham...
If not going to be a millionaire than the next best thing this world can give me is 'time'...time to relax, time to breathe, time to recover, time to do things on the side that bring me joy, even though no income involved.
And any situation that pulls me away from that, scares me, and even angers me.
I'm just to rebel now, at this stage of me life to be some low down wage slave.
I owe the rest of my life, what years I have left to 'me', and not to some corporate board so they can meet their numbers.