Side thoughts...

I envy the rich, not so much for their money, but for the fact they can remain locked up in their Mansions all day long, for weeks on end, without going out into public until totally ready to do so

As I sit here, soon, I must peer out into the public, well it's called 'work', jump out there, whether mentally ready to do so or not, but if want a income I must.

It can feel really jarring at times to have to get up and out when you're not mentally ready to, when you're kind of lost in your own 'world', your own inner world that has nothing to do with the physical reality world once you leave your place, and again it can be very jarring at times.

When your body, mind and soul, know you should just stay home, yet reality says 'Get your butt up and out there'....jarring I tell you.

When at home I feel so large, cause I'm the administrator of everything, the designer, Chief engineer and more, but as soon as I leave my place I'm instantly shrunk down to near nothing by other peoples perception of 'me'...and or you.

But I guess in a way we all do it to each other, some more than others though, and that is we shrink others based on our own perceptions of them while in public.

If only our minds could make us look how we feel on the inside, if our minds could make us look the way we need to look in order to seamlessly fit into whatever environment we're in at the time.

Friction, is all I seem to get, experience, from the time I leave place until the time I once again get to return to 'my place'.

This haunted basement scene just seems really 'dark' to me



The above scene from the movie 'Bad Ben', and it's where that demon or entity was staying.

The door was locked, until the hardheaded home owner forced his way in, and then wished he hadn't.

When character first enters this basement space, he starts coughing cause the odor was so foul, I imagine it smelled like decaying flesh, but there was no visible body or bodies, just the presence of 'evil'.

And maybe even 'evil' isn't the right term.

That aside, I've dreamed of damp, or even dry, basement places like this, where the air was just thick with a bad feeling, even though at first glace looks innocent enough, it's only when you linger is when one realizing there's a troubling presence in the room.

I mean if there are ghosts, I don't think the ghost intentionally tries or wants to be evil, territorial maybe?

But on the other hand, if the presence is demonic, who knows.

But then again, maybe to demons, we're the demons?

I mean maybe to demons, or spirits, it's fleshly man, who are the ones who are odd, weird and scary.

When at home and or off from work, I have to break things into 'periods', like when in school, in order to get things done

Remember how like in school you had 'periods', like 1st period, 2nd period and so forth, like how the day broken down into sections, well that's how I still operate even though out of school.

In other words I can't do one thing for to long or I just lose interest, so have to constantly change what I'm doing within the hour to keep my interest level high, but not sure if that hurts me or helps.

I think it hurts actually, cause I think those who really go on to master something, become the best at it, are able to focus all their energy on one thing not just for minutes, but for days, weeks, months, even years at a time.

But that's just not me.

I wish it were, but it's not.

If I have a hour to spare, I have to do at least 5 different things within that hour or I lose interest...maybe I need a councilor.

Yes, as I sit here right now (continued from above post) I realize it's the world that's about to take me on today, not the other way around, and if could would just hide, but I can't, must venture out there so that I can pay bills..

The difference between a blog forum like this and say twitter (among many), is that on here thoughts can be easily found, and basically stored and saved forever, or until forum ends.

Where as on twitter, you make one good point, a few people retweet it, but then it's buried, never to be read again, cause twitter is about 'now', instant now, rarely do people go back on twitter and 'dig' for something said 2 years ago, where as on here, you can find any topic if just go into 'search' tab and type in a word, name, place, event, and if it's on here it will come up...

I'll give an example on next post, I'll type 'car' into search tab and see what comes up.

Oddly enough, that July 6, 2016 post from above is more true to life than most realize, looking back, I now see just how correct that above post was, in that it's correct, if you don't keep moving forward, you, your life, thoughts and ideas will just kind of rot in place.

Very odd how in your dreams if have to go to the bathroom how it infuses reality of that into dream as in maybe fire hydrant going off, or volcano, or whatever, like your body trying to tell you it's really you that needs to go to the bathroom or else...