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Post by X factor on Jun 28, 2014 11:47:37 GMT -5
Being single to long can make you selfish
Being single for to long of a time can tend to make some of us selfish with our time and priorities.
Being or feeling lonely is one thing, committing to another is another thing all together.
Once you commit to another that means splitting your time in half, ect.
Now all those nights, days, mornings, being spent worrying about self, have to be spent worrying, thinking, caring about another, and that can be difficult if one has been single for a long time.
When single, everything is about 'self'.
Your bills, medical issues, hopes and dreams, income, job, recreational time, even the food you buy and eat, it's all about self.
But when in a relationship it's no longer all about self, now it's about 'the other person', what they want to eat, their income, their needs, their fears and joys, their concerns.
Making that transition can be difficult, more difficult than many realize, if having been single for years.
Making provisions, room in your life for another takes effort, and a genuine like of the person you're doing it for.
When younger 'lust' usually overrides the selfish part of 'self'.
But lust in and of itself is totally self orientated.
But as people age, and lust becomes less of a factor, other genuine reasons have to be what makes to people want to accomidate one another.
Also 'need' can sometimes make people accomidate one another, financial needs being probably the main one after lustful needs.
Initially, whether lust, finances, or general attraction, there has to be some kind of personal gain or incentive for a person to be willing to sacrifice personal time, and willing to occupy that time and attention with another.
And the longer one is single, the longer one becomes self reliant, the harder that part can be, expecially when older.
When naturally occurring male/female lust is no longer the driving factor of attraction one has to search deep down and ask themselves..'Why do I really want to be with anyone?'
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Post by X factor on May 24, 2020 21:08:35 GMT -5
Memorial day, OK.
I doubt the men dying on beaches were dying for today's types.
The men, dying on beaches, first off, didn't want to die, second if had to die for another, they weren't dying for today's types.
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Post by X factor on Dec 14, 2020 5:10:02 GMT -5
The Lady in this movie is like ideal to me, everything I would like in a woman, but I think it may be a male in drag, just my luck This movie is titled 'The taking of Deborah, Logan' It's suppose to be a scary movie on You Tube. But I got distracted by this character here..  This character here is suppose to be a woman, and or the daughter of ailing Mother. I say 'suppose to be a woman', cause upon closer examination, I think they may be a man, or 'use to be a man or male. Cause upon closer examination, it seems they have astetics on their face, like a partial mask or something, can tell by the deep sockets around the eyes and cheek bones. I say all this cause before I noticed all that, I was like, ye, this is the perfect woman for me, tall, older but still moves like they're in college, they move like I do, almost like a younger male would, and they even walk like a male, have slender hips like a male would. And have soft practical hands, like a younger male would. All the things I find attractive, but in a female, a older female who acts and moves youthful and dresses like a tomboy. But then I'm like wait a minute, are they even really a female?? I'll have to do further research when they role the credits to find out. But just my luck, I finally spot a woman in a movie that 'moves me', and it possibly could turn out to be a... 1. Transgender 2. Cross dresser or cross make-up person. I can't say they're cross dressing cause they're basically wearing male type of clothing. Watch part of the movie or scenes with them in it and you decide if they're a woman or not. I think it's 50/50 that they could be either gender, but I'm leaning more towards either a male playing a older lady in this movie, or a female who use to be a male. Again, just my luck and what does that say about my 'tastes', or what I find attractive in others?
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Post by X factor on Dec 14, 2020 5:16:44 GMT -5
The Lady in this movie is like ideal to me, everything I would like in a woman, but I think it may be a male in drag, just my luck This movie is titled 'The taking of Deborah, Logan' It's suppose to be a scary movie on You Tube. But I got distracted by this character here.. This character here is suppose to be a woman, and or the daughter of ailing Mother. I say 'suppose to be a woman', cause upon closer examination, I think they may be a man, or 'use to be a man or male. Cause upon closer examination, it seems they have astetics on their face, like a partial mask or something, can tell by the deep sockets around the eyes and cheek bones. I say all this cause before I noticed all that, I was like, ye, this is the perfect woman for me, tall, older but still moves like they're in college, they move like I do, almost like a younger male would, and they even walk like a male, have slender hips like a male would. And have soft practical hands, like a younger male would. All the things I find attractive, but in a female, a older female who acts and moves youthful and dresses like a tomboy. But then I'm like wait a minute, are they even really a female?? I'll have to do further research when they role the credits to find out. But just my luck, I finally spot a woman in a movie that 'moves me', and it possibly could turn out to be a... 1. Transgender 2. Cross dresser or cross make-up person. I can't say they're cross dressing cause they're basically wearing male type of clothing. Watch part of the movie or scenes with them in it and you decide if they're a woman or not. I think it's 50/50 that they could be either gender, but I'm leaning more towards either a male playing a older lady in this movie, or a female who use to be a male. Again, just my luck and what does that say about my 'tastes', or what I find attractive in others? I think you're right, I think it's a male, or former male, playing the role of a female. What does that say about your taste in women? It says you like tomboy types, it says you like the type of women you were raised up around, country gal types who are tall and athletic and practical and have soft hands like a younger guy would. Good luck trying to find someone like that where you live now. Cause where you live now all the women have swollen hands and odd looking long nails that look more like claws. |
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Post by X factor on Dec 14, 2020 5:25:05 GMT -5
Great, that's just great, that means I'd have to find a woman, who use to be a guy, but now that they're a woman, they still sorta dress and act like a younger guy whom I'd hang out with and go camping with and then get to have cookies and donuts with to top it all off.
You're right, good luck in me finding a companion like that cause most guys who have cross gender surgery, then want to look and dress like stereotypical women, with make up, nails, and all the other stuff I don't like.
When it comes to romance, I'm doomed.
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Post by X factor on Dec 14, 2020 5:33:31 GMT -5
Yep, I'm even more certain now that the character known as 'Sarah' in this movie is either a male or use to be a male Which I don't mind, but kind of bugs me they're playing a female, unless really a female. Would rather have them play 'sissy son', or just 'cute son', rather than pretending to be a female in this movie. But then again, if they're a post operation female, who use to be a male, than I guess they have all the right to play a female, if that's what they are now. Either way, just my luck to develop a crush on them, just to discover on my own, that they're probably a male or use to be a male. I need a drink.
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Post by X factor on Dec 14, 2020 5:41:25 GMT -5
Great, that's just great, that means I'd have to find a woman, who use to be a guy, but now that they're a woman, they still sorta dress and act like a younger guy whom I'd hang out with and go camping with and then get to have cookies and donuts with to top it all off. You're right, good luck in me finding a companion like that cause most guys who have cross gender surgery, then want to look and dress like stereotypical women, with make up, nails, and all the other stuff I don't like. When it comes to romance, I'm doomed.  Well hey you, you could always try your luck with a basket case like me |
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Post by X factor on Dec 20, 2020 14:16:33 GMT -5
Different levels of dating
There seems to be obvious different levels of dating, according to Dr Krozony from the Community College of Brazil
1. Recreational dating, meaning people who date not for marriage or to have hobbits down the road, but rather they date just for recreational purposes, to not feel alone.
a. Older people
b. Younger people, as in high school, college ect
c. LGBTQ type people
The question is, if older, either don't have a family, or family had already raised and grown or you're divorced, what kind of dating does one seek?
Seems like two main paths
1. Recreational dating
2. Slow and easy romance type dating.
Seems now days many adults who are done and tired with the romance stuff, just go for recreational dating, they skip the romance and go straight for the sox, according to Dr Krogen, Mogeen, from the University of Pakistan.
You have to decide what's best for you I guess...romance, which may or may not work, or 'springs and pillows', which is really just done to satisfy self first, and then if romance comes from it later 'fine', according to Masters degree holding Dr Uganda from Africa.
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Post by X factor on Dec 20, 2020 14:28:54 GMT -5
It's frustrating, cause in public, everyone acts all serious and wound up, and uptight and stiff, yet online, certain places, seems the whole world is sleeping together, the Librian who looked so serious suddenly on the couch eating a hot dog with the janitor, yet in real life seemed so uptight and religious.
I just don't seem to have any luck at all dating, none, zero.
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Post by X factor on Jan 3, 2021 11:46:55 GMT -5
I notice the most Red Neckish of guys, I mean swamp types hairy as big foot, have women, girlfriends, a date and a wife.
I notice urban thug type guys, gold teeth, wife beater shirt, in and out of prison types, have women, girlfriends, a date and a wife.
Yet if middle of the ground guy, not extreme in appearance, moderately handsome, I notice practically ignored by women.
What does that say about women?
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Post by X factor on Feb 14, 2021 1:16:24 GMT -5
What I miss, and so desire, is when another person just has a 'crush' on you, a innocent 'crush', that is when another just finds you attractive, to them.
You know how like 100 people can find you not so attractive, and then that one person comes along and just adores you...I so miss that, haven't had that in years, probably not sense leaving school.
The reason why that tends to happen in school is that you usually have to be around someone, another, or they around you, for a long period of time, repetitive time, daily, hourly, in order for you to stand out to them.
I guess could happen in work place as well, and does for many, but the job I work it doesn't cause usually work along and around the same sox as I am, and more blue collar type stuff.
I think in a office setting is where someone getting a 'crush' on you is more likely to happen, where people tend to dress up way better than in blue collar type jobs where dressing up really doesn't matter if going to get dirty, if job involves getting dirty.
But ye, all that aside, I miss it when someone has a crush on 'me', haven't had that in years.
And when did, I took it for granted, I really did take for granted how rare it is for another individual to actually find you special.
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Post by X factor on Apr 17, 2021 9:41:17 GMT -5
I know this much, you should never flirt, grope, ect, with a person you're really not attracted to or the next day you'll feel like garbage....cause when you do that you're basically lying, you're lying to yourself and lying to them...and that's what I did yesterday at a resturant, I flirted with a heavy set woman whom I did not find attractive at all, not in the least bit, but was just in a goofy mood.
And now today I feel bad about it, I'm sure they liked it, but I certainly most did not.
Flirting with a woman you're not attracted to, to me, feels as yukky as if not being gay, and then allowing or flirting with another 'male', like at a party, then the next day wanting to vomit.
It's the same thing to me, either you're genuinely attracted to someone or you're not, regardless of their gender, and that female from yesterday I just was not attracted to, I may as well be flirting with a guy, is how my body now interpits it.
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Post by X factor on Apr 17, 2021 9:45:10 GMT -5
What I learned though is this, from above post...I learned you have to be true to 'self', cause you can't fool your inner desires, as far as attraction goes.
Like a gay guy who marries a woman just to fit in socially, or a Lesbian who marries a man, just to socially fit in, I can only imagine how miserable they must feel and be all of the time, being with another they're not attracted to, or even arranged marriages where your male/female partner is picked out for you ahead of time, like in India or many middle Eastern societies.
I mean the lady I flirted with yesterday evening was nice, had a nice personality and all, but physically I may as well of been flirting with a man, as far as attractiveness goes.
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Post by X factor on Apr 17, 2021 10:44:35 GMT -5
Most places are about how you 'should feel', this place here is about how you 'really feel', at the moment.
And there's no way to 'pray away your feelings', people who are always praying away their feelings instead of dealing with their feelings, never really grow.
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Post by X factor on Apr 18, 2021 16:47:41 GMT -5
I'm lonely as hell right now, but surrounded by odd ball females, as in the one right next to me as fat as Jabba the Hut from Star Wars...I'd need injections or drugs to be turned on by that.
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