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Alone
Jun 1, 2020 2:36:32 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jun 1, 2020 2:36:32 GMT -5
I'm trying to understand why I should care about anything when I don't have a steak in nothing.
What is it am I trying to preserve?
I mean if a squirrel isn't worried about these odd issues, why should I be?
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Alone
Jun 1, 2020 2:41:12 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jun 1, 2020 2:41:12 GMT -5
What exactly does a billionaire have, that I can't have, or would even want?
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Alone
Jun 1, 2020 2:41:41 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jun 1, 2020 2:41:41 GMT -5
What exactly does a billionaire have, that I can't have, or would even want? OK, now you're being stupid. |
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Alone
Jun 1, 2020 2:52:14 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jun 1, 2020 2:52:14 GMT -5
What exactly does a billionaire have, that I can't have, or would even want? OK, now you're being stupid. Really I'm not though, I mean why should I be anymore envious of a billionaire than a Wasp is of me that has the ability to fly and sting? Or why should I be anymore envious of a Billionaire than a common alley cat is of me? The alley cat is perfectly content within it's own realm, and so am I. I guess, I mean at least that makes sense to me right now. |
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Alone
Jun 1, 2020 2:54:28 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jun 1, 2020 2:54:28 GMT -5
People are brainwashed into being envious of others, and that is the 'spell'.
And this is the 'Twylight Zone'....goodnight.
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Alone
Jun 6, 2020 14:56:50 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jun 6, 2020 14:56:50 GMT -5
Right now kind of feel like a gerbil in a cage, running inside wheel that goes nowhere.
Evaluating my own loneliness right now makes me wonder how anyone could keep a single pet alone inside a cage, or at least a mammal.
I don't think reptiles or amphibians or Fish to much care for companionship, until they mate.
But mammals, even rodents, I do believe desire companionship, is why they huddle together when they sleep.
So if have a pet, get 2, so not even your pet won't be or feel alone.
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Alone
Jul 17, 2020 19:21:42 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jul 17, 2020 19:21:42 GMT -5
Think I've had my fun for tonight, 3 cans of canned fish, sardines and whatever.
It's Friday night, people will go out and hurt each other, fight, argue, domestic stuff and more.
Me, I'll sit still, not do a thing, yet will be blamed for all of it.
If fear is power, than in that sense I guess I'm very powerful.
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Alone
Jul 17, 2020 19:25:00 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Jul 17, 2020 19:25:00 GMT -5
Yes, you soon begin to realize that 'your logic', no matter how much sense it makes to 'you', cannot over come 'fate' or the 'masters of fate'.
Knowing that, what do you do?
You sit back and relax, that's what you do, until 'called'.
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Alone
Aug 17, 2020 6:55:50 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Aug 17, 2020 6:55:50 GMT -5
I feel invisible at times, most of the times...  Sometimes I feel like a former classmate of mine now works for some dark secret opts, and that their life's mission is to make sure I remain cut off and isolated from everyone until very old and feeble. As if they're paying me back for some perceived negative notion they have about me since school days, and that they're obscessed with keeping me hidden away from the world out of pure spite. And they'll never come out and tell me who they are, do to Libal and slander laws. Or I could just simply be losing my mind. I mean in some ways I like being invisible to the world, but other times it can feel so g-d awful lonely. |
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Alone
Aug 26, 2020 2:45:46 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Aug 26, 2020 2:45:46 GMT -5
If there is a god, I think said god keeps me alone in order to protect my soul.  There are a lot of confused bad people out there who really are not good or have your best interest at hand. When alone and or lonely though, we tend to become more susceptible to such types. I mean when alone, one really doesn't care if a Pastor hugs them or a train robber, all one really wants, desires, is a hug. |
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Alone
Sept 15, 2020 9:25:46 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Sept 15, 2020 9:25:46 GMT -5
Yesterday being alone didn't feel so good or comfortable.
I even had energy, but energy without 'love', or feeling loved or appreciated, can take you in odd directions or moods.
If I could 'redo' parts of yesterday, I probably would.
To late now, can only learn from it now.
Life is really all about managing your moods.
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Alone
Oct 11, 2020 21:59:04 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Oct 11, 2020 21:59:04 GMT -5
Eating out of sheer loneliness tonight  You know, when you just eat stuff cause it's there, and swallowing it makes you feel better for a short while. And then when it hits your gut, it feels like someone just gave you a big hug.
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Alone
Oct 31, 2020 20:16:29 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Oct 31, 2020 20:16:29 GMT -5
My TV is off and won't turn it back on yet
My TV is off, and won't turn it back on yet, cause something weird happened with it the other night, it wouldn't turn off, and it would not respond to remote control, and the screen got smaller, it's as if TV was possessed or got hi-jacked by a hacker or something.
So for now, I'll leave it off, as I sit here alone on this Halloween night.
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Alone
Nov 3, 2020 21:52:53 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Nov 3, 2020 21:52:53 GMT -5
Alone, and it will be cold tonight  Alone, and it will be cold tonight. It's going to be cold tonight, and, well, I don't really have winter type blankets. I'll figure something out. My bed is more like a pile or mound of fabrics and linen, hard to explain, but I never sleep 'flat'. It's going to be cold tonight, and I'm alone, always alone. What a day though, what a day. We'll all have a new President soon, what a cliff hanger. Either way though, I'll still be all alone always and forever...goodnight.
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Alone
Nov 10, 2020 21:07:54 GMT -5
Post by X factor on Nov 10, 2020 21:07:54 GMT -5
Dear God, I know I'm the biggest loser you ever invented in all of life  Dear God, I apologize for being such a loser. A crowned loser? Not sure what I've done in the past to offend you or 'fate'. I mean no harm god, I'm just 'here'. And alive while alive. Then when gone, gone, as if never here. God, hey God, before I end this prayer, please answer this one question please... Am I fat??
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